I'm in Love with the Gorilla Sitting Next to Me - Volume 1 Chapter 3.2

Choose Carefully Whom You Consult Your Worries With 2

“Kacchin’s fetishes aside, if you’re done for now, can I talk to you about something?”

“Eh, yeah, sure… But I might not be very helpful.”

“It’s fine. I just want to hear the opinion of another guy. It’s not that serious.”

Indeed, Kacchin might not be average or typical, but he’s not a curse user like me, so his opinion could be useful.

“The thing is, there’s a girl I’ve been thinking about lately.”

“Wha!? You mean, like, love talk!?”

…I was surprised with an earth-shattering intensity. His eyes were wide open.

“Yeah, well, not exactly, I guess. It’s probably different.”

“Different…? That’s a relief. If it were about love, I’d be totally useless… I could only suggest using that game I lent you as a reference…”

“That game was not suitable for high school students, you know? My sister saw it, and it caused me a lot of trouble.”

“Ugh, you triggered a good event… I’m jealous…!”

It’s troubling to be looked at with such serious eyes. Anyway, moving on.

“The girl I’m talking about, her face is definitely not my type. She’s fun to talk to, but I don’t desire the kind of acts you’d want with a lover… What do you think?”

“What do I think…? That’s too vague. Do you like her or not?”

“Well, yeah, something like that. It’s like, do I like her as a friend, or is it a different kind of like?”

“Hmm… Normally, if you like someone, you’d want to do lover-like things with them. Like wanting to kiss or touch their breasts.”

“I don’t feel that way at all. Seriously, it’s not just me trying to look cool.”

After all, the person I see looks like an animal, so I genuinely don’t have the desire for those kinds of acts. It would be abnormal to do that with an animal.

I do have desires for my favorite 2D characters, so it’s not like my libido is dead. That’s why it’s difficult.

“Whether this is within the range of liking her as a friend or not, I can’t tell. Kacchin, have you ever fallen for someone? If you have, I’d like you to tell me for reference.”

“Nope. I don’t even have female friends to begin with.”

Kacchin gave me a dead fish-eyed look, and I pointed my handheld fan at him like a microphone.

“But Kacchin, you have a pretty wide circle of friends online, right? You have a lot of game friends.”

“You can’t bring gender into that. I also play as a female character with a female voice actor’s voice.”

“Huh. Why’s that?”

“It’s better to play as a girl. Plus, if you role-play well, the guys will pamper you and lavish you with gifts.”

Aha, I had a hunch, but this guy is not only a pervert but also a no-good person. I suspected as much since playing games with him often leads to dirty plays and foul language.

“Anyway, Kacchin, do you have someone you like right now?”

“How about a favorite character? Like an oshi, or maybe a waifu?”

“I can’t really get that into 2D characters, you know? I think they’re cute and sexy, but it’s just a vague kind of liking.”

“I think 3D girls are cute and sexy too. If only we could use hypnotic apps or magical contracts in real life, that would be amazing…”

“That’s totally skewed towards the erotic side. I’m talking about romance, okay?”

“But come on, we’re not elementary school kids anymore. I think affection and sexual desire come as a set. Even if it’s not someone you like, you still want to do that stuff, so wouldn’t it be even more intense with someone you actually have feelings for?”

“I hate to admit it, but my romantic experience is pretty much stuck at the elementary school level. Holding hands and getting excited might be as far as I go.”

“Well, I think most people also get excited by holding hands. They probably want to go further, too.”

Even if you say ‘further,’ I’m not some pervert who gets turned on by animals. Seriously, I need to break this curse.

What am I going to do if I can only get excited by 2D characters?

Thinking about my uncle who have struggled with the same issue for decades, I’m overwhelmed by a mix of respect, pity, and despair. In my case, it won’t be lifted until my younger brother’s child grows up… At the earliest, that’s over twenty years away. Yeah, that’s enough to make me cry.

As I let out another sigh, Kacchin seemed to misunderstand and looked apologetic.

“Sorry, Saiki-kun. I guess I’m not much help after all.”

“Nah, it’s not like that. I did understand that normally you’d want to do those things with someone you like.”

“That’s good to hear… By the way, just curious, but who’s the girl you’re interested in? She’s not from our club, is she?”

“No no, she’s a girl from my class.”

There are only two girls in the class who aren’t ghost members, so if it were one of them, it would feel like discovering a huge bomb. Kacchin also visibly relaxed.

“Oh, but Rui senpai and Makiyan senpai are dating. I saw them holding hands the other day and asked them about it.”

“What!? No way… Makiyan senpai, she was one of the few real girls who was nice to me…”

Oops, that seems to have done more damage than I thought. Senpai said, ‘It’s not a secret, so you can tell the other first-years’, so I just mentioned it casually.

“Sorry about that, Kacchin. Should I treat you to something sweet on the way home?”

“No, it’s okay. I need to take a nap to prepare for the late-night guild battle, and I want to play the game I downloaded. Let’s just go eat something sweet another time.”

“Well, if that’s what you want, Kacchin.”

I don’t have any complaints. But Kacchin, are you sure that game is really okay for high school students to play? With tentacles and cross-dressing and all, it seems full of worrying elements.

I couldn’t bring myself to ask because I’m sure he’d respond with a bright smile, so I just sat there silently, continuing to feel the slightly warm breeze from the electric fan.