Saint's Prison - Chapter 125

It Resembles a Blessing

The scene fades to black.

Discordant noise resonates, and static runs through.

The scene shifts from Stonehurst to Ryogo village.

— ZaZa, ZaZaZa.

My vision blurs.

The smell of something burning.

Charred corpses.

A red world.

***

White.

I don’t remember much about that time.

To be precise, I didn’t want to remember, so I covered it up in my memory.

If I hadn’t, I would have gone mad. The fierce passion that scratched the inside of my chest would have overflowed, and I would have cursed the world.

“…Due to the wooden construction, the fire spread very quickly… By the time we arrived, it was completely burned… The villagers were charred… Unidentified… Only one, a woman with a clean… face… confirmed…”

According to the police officer, all the villagers were dead.

“– Do you recognize the body?”

I looked at the corpse as the police officer told me to. Framed by long, wet black hair, her skin was white. Her glossy red lips held a faint smile. I stroked her cheek with my hand. Her skin was smooth and surprisingly cold.

“Shizuyo,” I whispered hoarsely.

She… Shizuyo is so beautiful, yet she’s dead. I thought it was a lie. She’s just sleeping. That’s what I wanted to say back.

Cold.

It’s cold.

I don’t feel the warmth of a living person at all.

Ando Shizuyo is undoubtedly dead.

“Ando-san, I understand this is difficult for you.”

I nod to the questioning voice.

Vaguely, I stared at Shizuyo.

“…She’s my sister. This girl is my sister, Ando Shizuyo.”

“I see… My condolences.”

To the police officer, who awkwardly lowered his gaze, I weakly shook my head.

I don’t need comfort.

I don’t ask for prayers.

Even if you do such things, she won’t come back.

A blank space.

“…The cause of death was carbon monoxide poisoning. The location of the discovery was… in the basement. She tried to escape the fire by going to the basement… probably, from the basement to the cave– however, there were odd points–”

My thoughts are hazy.

The words don’t sink in.

“…There are many wounds on the soles of her feet, she was walking barefoot on the rocks… The direction of the fallen body… It’s not towards the entrance of the cave… It’s facing the door of the basement. The smoke didn’t reach the back of the cave. She should have survived as she was. But– your sister ran to the cave, then for some reason, she returned–”

White paper, margins, blanks.

A blank.

Space.

— Nothingness.

***

— Before I knew it, I was standing in front of Shizuyo’s grave.

A drop of water fell with a plop.

Is it raining?

I looked up at the sky.

Strange, it’s so sunny today.

Plop, plop.

“Oh, it’s raining… huh… hah, uggh.”

I realized then that I was crying. As soon as I understood that, it was all over. Everything collapsed.

“Shizuyo, Shizuyo, Shizuyo, ahh!”

I can’t stop my tears.

“Why, why is this happening!! Damn it, damn it. Shizuyo should have been the happiest of anyone, yet!! For that, I, I… why, why… I couldn’t do anything for her. I couldn’t protect her!!”

I look up at the sky and wail.

I can’t pray for God.

Because I don’t believe in the existence of God, I’ve always prayed for someone who is not God. So, is this a punishment?

If that’s the case–

“– Die. Die. Die. Die. You die. Not Shizuyo, you die!! Only you should die!! Ahh, you… I, I should have died!!”

My vision is dyed red with anger.

“Die.”

Uncontrollable emotions gush out.

“Die horribly.”

As I impulsively picked up a stone that had fallen and tried to hit my own head, I heard a clanging noise.

The sound came from right behind me.

When I turned around, no one was there.

Clang, another noise.

I looked around, but there was nothing. But, I didn’t think it was just a hallucination. Because the sound was similar to the sound of the wooden clogs that Shizuyo always wore.

“… Is it, Shizuyo?”

There’s no answer.

Even though I knew it, I was bitterly disappointed.

Even though I knew better, I was beyond salvation.

I sighed and looked down. Then, I noticed something on the ground.

A white, simple flower.

“Hah, … huh, ugh, uhh.”

It was the flower that Shizuyo liked, the shepherd’s purse.

An out-of-season shepherd’s purse was placed quietly.

Seeing that, the tears that had begun to stop started to overflow again.

“Onii-sama, please don’t cry.”

I felt like I could see Shizuyo standing in front of my tear-blurred vision, saying that with a gentle smile. It’s a convenient delusion. But I couldn’t help but think so.

“– Promise. Live on, remembering me.”

Those words, they resembled both a blessing and a curse.

TLN : only 1 chapter today. im still sick, also happy new year guys!