There’re Always Paranoid Thoughts to Monopolize Me - Chapter 59.2

How… how could this person have the nerve to say such shameless things?

The psychologist…

She realized she had worried for nothing earlier. This person indeed needed a psychologist, but it seemed the illness that needed treatment was something else entirely.

Sensing the girl’s emotion of almost being angered with embarrassment, Huo Jun finally stopped, no longer pressing the girl’s hand onto his bare chest.

He had finished teasing and flirting enough. He withdrew his hand, placed it back under his head, and maintained a position of looking up at the girl lying on top of him.

—

That’s right, he was looking at her.

Unlike Qin Ke, Huo Jun had excellent night vision.

Moreover, since childhood, he disliked bright light and was accustomed to his room having little illumination. He had grown used to seeing in darkness. So the current dimness in the room didn’t cause any trouble for Huo Jun’s vision at all.

Therefore, from the moment the girl entered the room, he had been seriously watching her just like now.

Originally, because of the psychologist’s advice during the therapy session, he had planned to temporarily suppress his desire for the girl and not do anything.

However, when he saw Qin Ke helplessly reaching out her hand in the darkness, searching for something, and almost missing him by a hair’s breadth, Huo Jun couldn’t help but reach out.

As he embraced her in his arms, he couldn’t help but sigh inwardly.

Indeed.

Suppression and self-control were too torturous for him.

Nothing made him feel more satisfied than holding Qin Ke, whom he had been yearning for, firmly in his arms.

But…

Just as Huo Jun frowned, thinking of something, he suddenly heard the soft voice of the girl who had finally freed herself from his restraint and sat up leaning against the sofa backrest.

“I just saw the psychologist.”

“Mm.”

Based on the calculation of this not-so-opportune time of Qin Ke’s return, Huo Jun wasn’t surprised by this result. He also knew that Qin Ke must have more to say.

So Huo Jun remained silent. In the darkness where the girl couldn’t see, he gazed at her beautiful and delicate face almost greedily, watching her hesitate and slightly furrow her brows, seemingly struggling with how to phrase it without hurting him.

That struggling little expression made Huo Jun’s heart itch as if rows of ants were crawling through it. He couldn’t help but want to pull her back, but this time, he wanted to flip her over and press her down, kissing her thoroughly until she whimpered and begged for mercy…

Huo Jun’s gaze grew increasingly intense, and at a certain unspeakable point, he promptly suppressed those increasingly dangerous thoughts.

He uncomfortably averted his gaze, his throat suppressing a muffled, hoarse cough.

Meanwhile, Qin Ke, who had been struggling with how to begin speaking, remained completely unaware of all these changes and the “danger” that had just passed by her side.

In these quiet ten-odd seconds, she finally made up her mind to speak.

“Huo Jun, can you tell me why you suddenly went to see a psychologist again?”

“…”

What responded to her was endless darkness and silence.

Qin Ke anxiously clenched her fingertips. “If you really don’t want to say, it’s okay… but if you don’t mind, I want to hear you say it. Because I hope I can help you, not just stand by and watch, unable to do anything.”

This made her very worried.

It was like watching someone walk on the edge of a steep cliff with her own eyes, yet forever unable to reach out and pull him back.

Qin Ke’s personality determined that it was difficult for her to express such intimate feelings without hesitation.

But what she didn’t know was that at this moment in the darkness, all her emotions were written on her face – which also made Huo Jun, who originally didn’t want to speak, finally change his mind.

So, after a long silence in the room, just when Qin Ke had almost dimmed her eyes and wanted to give up, she heard a low, hoarse voice near her ear.

“…Hallucinations.”

“?” Qin Ke was stunned, hurriedly casting her gaze in the darkness, trying to look at the young man whose outline she could barely see. “What?”

Then she heard the young man let out a low breath, seeming to laugh and sigh at the same time.

“I’ve started having hallucinations, Qin Qin.”

“…!”

Qin Ke’s heart suddenly tightened.

In this instant, her heart ached so much that her face turned pale.

If it really was hallucinations…

Whether it was a mental illness or a psychological disorder, it indicated that it had developed to a somewhat serious stage, perhaps even beyond intervention therapy and requiring medication or mechanical treatment…

Qin Ke unconsciously bit her lip, her fingertips digging into her palm, her gaze wandering chaotically in thought, completely unaware of the pain.

In the darkness, the young man who had been maintaining that position of watching her with his arm under his head remained motionless.

After looking like this for a few seconds, the young man lowered his eyes.

He silently curved the corner of his mouth.

But unlike ever before, this time, if the lights were on, Qin Ke would see a bitter smile on the young man’s face that had never appeared before.

——

He had thought that when she first heard him reveal such a frightening truth, her initial reaction would be to run away.

After all, from the very beginning, she had been forced into associating with him, unable to escape being with him… So he thought that upon hearing his condition had progressed to this stage, she would only want to flee far away.

However, that wasn’t the case.

In that instant, the girl’s face showed only sadness, worry, pain… Various complex emotions intertwined, but notably absent were the fear and distance Huo Jun had expected.

Running wildly when she shouldn’t, clinging to him; when she should run, instead…

“Huo Jun, I’ll accompany you through treatment – it will definitely get better!”

He saw the girl clench her fists tightly, biting her lip, seemingly not believing it herself yet still trying her best to comfort him.

“…”

Huo Jun chuckled softly.

He finally couldn’t resist, reaching out his hand again to pull the girl, who had just managed to sit on the edge of the sofa in the darkness, down once more.

This time she was actually prepared, but only stiffened for a second when he gripped her wrist, then allowed herself to be pulled towards him.

This time they were even closer.

Hot breath was mere inches away.

He reached out his fingers, gently pinching the girl’s chin, forcing her to stop tormenting her already pale lips.

Then, replacing her breath, he leaned up and kissed them.

“Qin Qin, I was wrong.”

In the scorching breath, while Qin Ke’s consciousness was still muddled by the gentle nibbling kiss on her lips, she heard Huo Jun say this.

She unconsciously made a “Mm?” sound.

The response was only a laugh, pressed even lower and hoarser. “I originally thought you were especially smart… After all, back then, only you knew to stay away from me… Now I see, I was wrong.”

With these words, Huo Jun finally slowly propped himself up, gripping the girl’s wrist, then flipped over, pressing her onto the sofa.

He supported himself, looking down at her from above.

The girl, suddenly finding herself in the lower position, was still confused. “…Huo Jun?”

The young man didn’t speak.

He bent down, kissing her lips forcefully, as if venting some negative and fierce emotions – and then finally, everything returned to calm.

He slumped against the girl’s neck, inhaling the fresh scent of her hair, his voice weary and bitter as he laughed.

“I think I’ve gone completely mad, Qin Qin…”

The girl silently endured.

After a long while, she gently grasped his hand, their fingers slowly interlocking.

“Then I’ll accompany you, okay?”