A Kid You Can’t Leave Alone?

As the sunlight streaming into the food court turned red, flickering annoyingly between my notebook and view, I thought it was about time to leave. We began to head home at a reasonable hour.

Walking side by side along the wide sidewalk of the main road, Kinoshita and I cast long shadows.

“Thank you very much for today. I really had fun.”

She’s not the kind to say things she doesn’t mean, so I believed her and nodded.

“If it made up for things, that’s good.”

At that, Kinoshita froze for a moment. I stopped walking too.

“Kinoshita?”

“Oh, no. Right, making up for things…”

She murmured quietly, then looked at me and bowed her head.

“I’m glad you spent time with me.”

Ah… This makes it sound like I did her a favor.

“Maybe ‘making up’ was the wrong term. It’s not like I reluctantly spent time with you, so don’t make it sound like I did you a favor.”

“Well, but…”

“Let’s just say it was an excuse.”

“An excuse?”

“Yeah, like an excuse to get some studying tips from you.”

I said jokingly. Kinoshita seemed taken aback, then looked away.

“You’re really… kind, Goda-san. You can do anything, you don’t hesitate to put in effort… And yet, you can talk to someone like me and have fun… I really envy you.”

“Envy?”

“Oh, I mean…”

It might have been a mutter to herself, but I heard it.

“Maybe we should stick with ‘making up.'”

“Huh?”

“I mean, you were just doing your job as the discipline committee member, but I interfered… And I ended up needing your help with test prep, so it doesn’t feel like I properly made up for anything.”

“N-no, that’s not true. I had never enjoyed studying so much before──”

“Well, anyway, if there’s anything I can help you with now, let me know.”

“Uh…?”

Was that a bit too much? I wondered, glancing at her. Kinoshita looked at me with a slightly bewildered expression.

“Help… with what?”

“Even if it’s something you haven’t told anyone before. I’m pretty good at giving advice.”

…Whether it works perfectly or not is another matter.

“Now that you mention it, you did say so yesterday, Goda-san. That if I had any problems… Am I really that easy to read?”

Kinoshita looked down. Easy to read? Well, let’s see.

“If it’s something you haven’t told anyone, it might be good to have someone to talk to.”

I hoped she saw me not just as a random guy who appeared out of nowhere but as someone she could talk to.

If she rejected me here, her guardedness might discourage me. But surprisingly, today seemed to have made her more comfortable with me.

“Well, if it’s not a bother…”

“Not at all.”

When I smiled and said that, she seemed surprised and said,

“If it gets too bothersome, just tell me!”

Who would do that?

“Don’t worry. It won’t be as much trouble as you think.”

“If you say so…”

A moment of hesitation. She seemed to be searching for the right words. We walked slowly toward the station, allowing her time to gather her thoughts. It turned out choosing a less crowded station was a good idea.

“──Ever since elementary school, I’ve been called serious.”

She began, her voice quiet. I looked at her, her head bowed, her emotions hard to read.

“At first, I thought it was a compliment. My grades were… decent. Probably not bad compared to others. So, I kept doing my best, thinking I was on the right path.”

Her eyes wavered, giving an impression of loneliness.

“I thought what I was doing was right. Listening to the lessons, improving my grades, getting praised by teachers… I took pride when they said everyone should be like me… But one day, a classmate laughed at me.”

Her memories from elementary school were deeply ingrained. Not just due to good memory, but because they were etched with shock.

This must be close to Kinoshita’s trauma.

“──The teacher saying everyone should be like Kinoshita was just because it made things easier for the teacher, not because you were exceptional.”

“I see. Quite a sharp-tongued kid.”

“Unlike that sharp-tongued kid, I didn’t understand at first. But as I became a middle schooler, gradually…”

Kinoshita bit her lip and continued.

“There were more kids who could get better grades than me without studying… More kids who were admired despite causing trouble… Seeing people do things that would trouble others being accepted as normal, I started doubting what was right.”

She gripped her skirt tightly and murmured with a bitter smile.

“Before I knew it, I was in high school… and became a nuisance to the class…”

“I see.”

…That’s heavy!

It’s unbelievably heavy, and she did nothing wrong!

I wanted to strangle that sharp-tongued brat. Wait, calm down.

Goda Ryoma is a perfect man. Goda Ryoma is a perfect man. Priorities over anger.

“So… Kinoshita. Even so, you joined the discipline committee, right? Why?”

“They said I was suited for it. And there was no one else.”

“Would you have joined if you weren’t invited?”

“…I’m not sure.”

She looked up at the sky in thought.

“I’ve always disliked things that were unfair. Especially things that troubled others. That’s been true since elementary school. So, I might have joined on my own back then…”

“What’s different now?”

She nodded slightly.

“Recently, I’ve been thinking that what I find disturbing is just my personal dislike, and maybe others think I’m the one being unreasonable… So, I’m not confident I should be the one enforcing rules. I’m not sure if I would have joined on my own.”

Yet she still enforces the rules strictly.

“Even if you’re unsure, you work hard because not doing your job would trouble the discipline committee…?”

“That’s how I feel. But…”

Kinoshita laughed softly, a sad smile.

“…I can’t confidently deny that I’m just complaining about things I find annoying… I don’t want to admit that I might be wrong, even while thinking I might be.”

She murmured, almost spitting out the words.

“It’s a selfish… story…”

Her strong sense of responsibility and seriousness made her harsh on herself.

It’s not normal to think you should ignore things that bother you because others don’t mind. It’s normal to follow the values you’ve lived by.

Her words about studying came back to me. She thought working hard was natural, but now she doubted if her efforts were misdirected.

Admitting that years of effort were wasted is tough.

Like giving up on a sport after realizing you have no talent.

“…Because of that, I haven’t been getting along with my parents recently.”

“Your parents?”

“Even though I’m doing my best, they ask about school and other things I can’t answer well… It makes me hate myself.”

Here it is, the recent reason for Kinoshita’s odd behavior.

“You could just give vague answers.”

When I said that, Kinoshita shook her head.

“I don’t like lying. My mom raised me alone… It’s terrible. We end up fighting. Maybe I should make it so she doesn’t worry about me with lies… But I don’t even think of that…”

“Kinoshita, you’re very serious.”

“…Yes. That’s all.”

“Even if I say you should relax, it’s hard for someone as serious as you.”

When I said that, Kinoshita’s expression tightened. Telling someone to take it easy when they’re struggling isn’t helpful. But…

“Saying something is annoying is normal for people. Trying to eliminate it might be too far, but this is about rules.”

“Is that so? Even if you say it’s normal, I can’t be happy…”

Her voice was barely audible. It was true, telling her to keep pushing through wasn’t helpful.

I shook my head, trying to cheer up the mood.

“It’s okay, Kinoshita. You don’t have to suppress what you believe is right.”

I wanted to help Kinoshita’s situation. It might be overstepping, and she might tell me to stop, but…

“…Goda-san, what do you mean?”

“Just listen.”

I smiled at her confused expression.

“Kinoshita, you said you envied me, right?”

Instantly, she blushed.

“Huh, oh… forget that!”

“Nope, I won’t.”

Even if she’s used to being alone, she enjoyed our time together. She looked genuinely happy when helping me study. This girl is just lonely, not by choice, but circumstance.

“Let’s make some friends, Kinoshita.”

“…Huh?”

Her efforts might be misdirected, but it’s a hard truth.

Listening to her, this seems to be the only solution.

Kinoshita looked stunned, so I continued.

“I guarantee it. Making friends will solve everything.”

“…Friends.”

She hesitantly took out her phone. Her LINE friend list… Wait, her only friends are her mom and me?

“You mean this list?”

What’s with that innocent face?

“Well, yeah. It’s similar.”

“I see… But I’m adding one friend a year…”

“We can change that.”

At my words, Kinoshita looked up sharply.

I smiled, setting a new goal.

“Let’s make studying with friends a common thing.”

Her bewildered face at that moment was unforgettable.