My Childhood Friend Attacked Me When I Declared That Her Birthday Present Was 'Me' - Chapter 13

Morning and Alcohol

Chirp- chirp- chirp- chirp- chirp- chirp-

I can hear the chirping of birds.

The time is… 6 o’clock…

The night has ended, and a new day has begun…

In front of me is the sight of Daigorou-san, soundly sleeping as if he was collapsed from exhaustion.

He’s snoring and sleeping heavily.

After that, Daigorou-san’s machine-gun talk, which never stopped after [Isn’t my daughter cute?], kept going as he continually cracked open beers…

“Sigh…”

There’s a mountain of beer cans on the table… I quickly count and there are at least 20… no, there’s more.

“It’s like a pirate’s banquet… the booze stinks…”

Just like with cigarettes, the smell of alcohol seeps in.

I myself feel as if I’m soaked in alcohol.

My daughter is lovely.

She’s the cutest in the world.

She could be a model, but she’s also smart.

She could even be a doctor.

I think she should take an audition right now.

The juices that never stop pouring out like an avalanche… no, it’s praise for Kaori, his daughter, or in other words… doting father?

I match the rhythm of the conversation with appropriate responses like…

[Hehー] [Ohー] [Ahー] [Yes.] [That’s right…]

For about 7 hours… since around 11 o’clock… it’s 7 hours, unreal.

I wish you could put yourself in my shoes. My ears are becoming like Dumbo. Well, maybe they have already become that way. I wouldn’t know since I can’t see it myself.

(TN: Disney’s Dumbo, big ears.)

“Why are you casually snoring… I’m the one who’s tired…”

Kouta lets out a long sigh.

They say that when you sigh, happiness escapes, but I’m currently in the midst of unhappiness, so I’m invincible, huh?

“Sigh… I should have never said that…”

“Good morning! ! !”

“Shut up! That’s not a morning voice!” (TN: She screams.)

The source of noise and the source of worries have arrived at super high speed.

“Oh, Dad’s already sleeping here. If Mom comes, I’ll have to ask her to wake him up.”

“Huh? Wake him up?”

“Of course? Dad has work, you know?”

“Seriously…”

He drank over 20 cans of beer and stayed up all night drinking, and now he’s going straight to work?

“Even extroverted college students have a slightly better lifestyle…”

“It’s okay! Dad has his Dad’s power!”

“I don’t think that’s the issue…”

“He used to chug vodka back in the day.”

“….If that’s the case, he should be okay.”

Even I, who doesn’t know much about alcohol, know that name from a certain detective.

(TN: Maybe a character named Vodka from Conan.)

If he has the power to chug that… he should be fine. Or rather, he got drunk on beer, huh? His frustrations must have been building up a lot…

“More importantly, Kouta-kun?”

“Yes?”

“Sighing is bad, you know? Happiness will escape.”

“Did you watch me sighing…”

Don’t just watch. Come here, and come here elegantly.

“(Inhale) Suuu~! Why do you need to sigh like that?”

“Don’t inhale my sighs! It’s surprising that you can say such things when you’re the source of my worries.”

“Huh? Am I the source of your worries?”

“Who else would it be?”

“Ah~, I see. Is it a sigh about how your girlfriend is too cute~♪”

“Maybe you should consider stopping thinking so positively?”

“Being positive is the best!”

” …….. “

It’s no good. Stupid positivity is the worst.

“It’s happening right now, my regret. I regret saying, [I am the ‘gift’]”

“There’s no need to regret it. You can think of it as Kouta-kun’s unique way of proposing.”

“Then it’s a shame that’ll last for a lifetime?”

What a stupid proposal. What a shameful proposal.

“But thanks to those words, we became lovers.”

” ………. “

“What’s the matter, Kouta-kun?”

“Well, let’s say, hypothetically…”

“Yes?”

“What if we both found someone else we liked?”

“You can’t do that. End of story.”

“Let’s listen to the whole story.”

You’re too quick to flip the table.

“Let’s say, hypothetically. What if I did? In that case, this agreement is…”

“Because I’m carrying your baby.”

“Scary…”

That’s a power move word, [carrying your baby].

Impressive.

“I’ve taken in enough of Kouta-kun’s milk, that should be the case.”

“Don’t talk about such explicit things.”

“Raw, indeed?”

(TN: playing on the word “生” (raw), which sounds the same as the “生” (graphic/explicit) )

You really like that word, don’t you?

“That’s why, even if you find someone else you like, if you value this life inside me, you’re mine forever, Kouta-kun. You can’t escape.”

“Those words are scary.”

“Do you, by any chance, have someone else you like right now?”

“No, I don’t.”

“That’s a relief…”

“What would you do if there was someone else?”

“I’d kill them. I’d send them to the other side of sorrow.”

(TN: Something like inflicting harm or taking extreme action will lead to a state beyond sorrow or emotional pain. cmiiw.)

Don’t [School Days] me. Don’t relentlessly stab anyone. (TN: Anime.)

“So keep loving me, okay?”

“…That’s not a threat, is it?”

Your smile scares me already.