Ranobe Mo Ore Mo Sukina Gyaru - Volume 1 Chapter 13.4

Gal and Breakfast 4

“For now, I don’t need to rephrase it… I’ve realized my feelings for myself, so that’s enough. It’s not really like me…I’ve realized it’s not really like me, but that’s fine…”

After uttering these self-reassuring words, she looked at me.

Although her tears had stopped, Tsumakawa still had moist eyes and spoke again,

“Um, so… what was it that I wanted to say?”

“Something like that, only Tsumakawa-san would know, right?”

“Hehe, I guess. Um… so, in other words… it’s just that when I’m feeling down, thanks for being kind to me. That’s all!”

“Ah, I see… That’s what you wanted to say…”

“Yeah, exactly! From now on, I’ll come to stay over more often, so make sure you have a special futon for me or something in your room!”

“Geez, you gal, seriously… This is a one-time thing. I won’t allow this kind of thing in the future, you know?”

“Well, maybe I’ll leave something behind at Yoda’s place next time. Then, I can use going back to get it as an excuse to come to Yoda’s place again. I wonder what I should ‘accidentally’ forget…?”

“You’re quite the schemer… I’ll have to thoroughly keep an eye on you to make sure you don’t leave anything behind!”

“Maybe I should leave my shorts behind. If I do that, I don’t think Yoda will dare to touch them.”

“Spare me. Please remember to take everything back with you.”

“Ah, by the way, ‘ショーツ(shōtsu)’ refers to panties, women’s underwear. I’m wearing the pink ones with ribbons.”

“I already knew that, so you didn’t need to explain. But did you really need to disclose the specific information about the panties you’re wearing right now?”

“Hehe, I thought Yoda would be happy to know.”

“Ugh, I’m not happy about it, you idiot!”

“Yet you’re saying that with a huge grin on your face, huh?”

With those words, Tsumakawa lightly hit my shoulder.

…It’s good that the atmosphere has become relaxed.

Even though I wasn’t really happy to hear that, it was worth it to smile after hearing Tsumakawa’s panties information…

——I smiled on purpose just to get her to smack me, okay? I swear!

As I was coming up with these excuses in my head, Tsumakawa showed a bright smile for the first time in a while and asked me,

“Will you stay with me from now on?”

“W-Well, that is, um… I won’t reject being together for no reason…”

“Ah, I phrased it wrong. ——I’ll be with you from now on, so please take care of me!”

“Being together is a done deal, huh…”

When I retorted with a puzzled look, Tsumakawa smiled while looking at me.

On the other hand, as I saw her smiling face, at the same time, I found myself thinking about various things——

『Uh, um, Yoda… Yoda-kun! I, I… I want… want to be… to be——』

When Tsumakawa started saying that, I once again thought, ‘Stop, please.’ It’s not because I dislike her… It’s because I like her.

At that moment, when Tsumakawa said that with different, more genuine emotions than before, I might have ended up making a choice that I would regret.

Whether I accepted or declined, either way might have led to regrets.

To be honest, I didn’t want to accept. …Because I haven’t developed those kinds of feelings yet.

Moreover, I don’t think I even have the qualifications to accept.

That’s why I didn’t think this would happen… But precisely because of that, I became afraid of turning down her offer and losing everything.

If Tsumakawa said that to me right now, our current relationship would probably come to an end.

Fearful of that, I found myself thinking, ‘I don’t want that’

…because, somehow, I realized that I actually find this situation of being with Tsumakawa enjoyable.

Not wanting to lose this relationship…is that the reason why I’m feeling this way?

Not wanting to lose this relationship…is that the reason why I’m feeling this way?

” ….. “

“Hey, don’t stare too much… My makeup’s a mess, and I’m looking ugly. If you’re going to look, wouldn’t it be better to look at me when my makeup’s still intact?”

“N-No, it’s not like… I’m looking at Tsumakawa-san or anything…”

Saying this, I hastily averted my gaze from Tsumakawa…I could feel my cheeks getting warm.

I remembered my past self, the one who used to say he wouldn’t trust 3D girls.

——When did I become like this?

I still think I can’t become friends with a gal like Tsumakawa, but…

I can’t believe that I’m afraid of not being with her anymore.

As a genuine otaku, I should always have my AT Field (Absolute Terror Field) up around my heart.

However, she somehow managed to get inside…and before I knew it, she was a part of my life.

…I realized that I had started watching the official YouTube channel of 『leg』 the agency she was affiliated with as a model. Or I would read the magazine she gave me occasionally.

Lately, I’ve been checking my phone a lot to make sure I don’t ignore messages on LINE. Ultimately, I… I like Tsumakawa.

Not in a romantic way. Not as a friend…but as a person.

She’s a nice person who’s kind to even someone like me, and I felt good about being with Tsumakawa.

——I, I don’t know if ‘like’ is the right word. But I guess I found her to be likeable.

So, when she seemed like she was about to confess her feelings to me, I got scared.

I didn’t want to reject her and lose this connection, and I couldn’t confidently say that I liked her enough to accept it, so I became afraid of hearing that from Tsumakawa-san.

I didn’t want to sort out these feelings of mine!

While screaming that internally, I stole a glance at her face.

For now… I can’t be honest with her, but one thing is for sure: I do think of Tsumakawa-san in a positive light.

At the very least, I have to tell her how I honestly felt about the breakfast I had with her.

“Thank you for making the meal… The sandwich was delicious.”

“Hehe, you finally said it. It’s about time you spoke up.”

As if she had been waiting for those words from me, Tsumakawa-san said that with a smile.

Witnessing her radiant smile, I felt like I understood a little bit about what she often refers to as ‘like’ but not ‘love’.