Reborn as a succubus - Chapter 48

Xi Che returned from Meng Xinghe’s place with deep disappointment. The moment he stepped into the main hall, he saw Chu Qi. When the latter looked at him, he hurriedly gathered up his emotions and pretended to be calm as he walked over.

Chu Yan reached out to lightly tap his shoulder, retracting a wisp of his own divine spirit, and casually asked,

 “What did he say to you?”

But he hadn’t expected Xi Che’s reaction to be so drastic. His fingers had merely brushed the other’s clothes when Xi Che suddenly took a big step back right in front of him.

Honestly speaking, even between ordinary friends, such a reaction would be hurtful. Chu Yan froze for a moment, while Xi Che, realizing his overreaction, sighed lightly as if nothing had happened, deliberately avoiding his gaze.

“Nothing. Just the usual corporate-style pep talk — painting big dreams to make the new recruit obedient.”

Chu Yan looked at him expressionlessly — he had, in fact, heard the whole conversation. He knew Meng Xinghe wanted Xi Che to return to the Divine Academy of as a spy, ostensibly to investigate Rong Jiudao. But the exact goal of this “investigation” was vague, and Meng Xinghe himself was a strange man. His requests were never simple.

Asa (Xi Che) should’ve sensed something off, Chu Yan thought. He had hoped he would treat him as an ally to discuss countermeasures with — but instead, he had chosen to hide things from him.

That deliberate avoidance and distance were written all over his face.

Chu Yan had originally thought using the form of Chu Qi might help Asa gradually get used to his presence, but now it seemed their relationship was only moving in the exact opposite direction.

Xi Che, having avoided him, also realized his reaction had been too much. If he wasn’t mistaken, Chu Qi’s usually blank face had even shown a flash of hurt. But he was feeling too low to care — his head was filled with thoughts of Chu Yan. The more he thought of him, the more hopeless he felt; the more hopeless, the more he couldn’t stop thinking of him… it was a vicious cycle.

He coughed awkwardly and turned his eyes aside.

“Anyway, let’s head back. I’m starving after this whole day.”

Chu Yan frowned as he watched Xi Che’s back retreating. He swallowed back all the words he wanted to say. Xi Che’s attitude now was one of total refusal to communicate, and he knew that the more he tried to talk, the more the other would resist.

He tried to stay rational — but after so many days of this coldness, frustration began to eat away at him. He felt he had to do something; otherwise Asa would only drift further away.

He wasn’t confident — not confident that Asa’s feelings for him were what he hoped. The ambiguity that had always existed between them only deepened that insecurity. Every time that unease arose, he would find himself desperate to confirm Asa’s feelings again.

That was when he thought of the Dream Stone.

If Asa could only open his heart to the dream version of him — then why not use it again?

The thought took hold, excitement quietly building inside him. Meanwhile, Xi Che was still lost in Meng Xinghe’s words, that faint ache in his heart spreading like a fire that refused to go out.

Dinner was unusually silent. Xi Che didn’t notice. He wanted to go out for a walk — but as soon as he stood, thunder began to roll through what had been a clear sky. Clouds churned thick and black above, streaked with flashes of red lightning. A sense of unease crept over him.

Something about this storm wasn’t right.

He couldn’t say exactly what — only that the clouds were too dark, the thunder too heavy. Having once been a God of War, Xi Che still remembered the laws of the Nine Netherworlds; this weather felt like the heavens were warning of something.

He worried silently. Hopefully, nothing had happened to Chu Yan.

He didn’t notice how cold Chu Yan’s face had gone — nearly glacial. He had forgotten that divine warnings were always meant for the most important of gods. When a god’s will wavered, danger followed. Heaven’s law couldn’t change fate — it could only warn the Three Realms through celestial signs.

No one knew if the thunder was warning Chu Yan or condemning Xi Che. As the God of Light, with more followers than any other, Chu Yan should have been pure and desireless, but his heart had grown clouded by longing, and the heavens mourned in thunder.

“Eat first, then get some sleep. You look exhausted.”

Xi Che heard Chu Yan’s voice behind him and was suddenly overwhelmed by fatigue. He murmured an absent “Mm,” turned around — and met his eyes.

The world swayed. His vision blurred, and it was as though something drew his consciousness out of him.

Chu Yan caught him just as he collapsed, holding him close. He carried him back to the bedroom and gently laid him on the bed.

Outside, the rain finally began to fall. Chu Yan closed the window, shutting out the storm — and the heaven’s rebuke that seemed to call him a beast. In his hand glowed the violet-red Dream Stone. He pressed it into Xi Che’s palm, intertwining their fingers.

Xi Che frowned in his sleep. Chu Yan leaned down, kissed his forehead, and whispered:

 “Asa… I’ve missed you so much.”

—

At some point, Xi Che found himself dreaming again — but this time, the dream seemed normal. Everything was vague, faces blurred except for one: Chu Yan’s.

Just like their first meeting — standing among a crowd, calm and certain, looking only at him.

Xi Che felt oddly entranced. Since this dream wasn’t one of those chaotic ones, he relaxed and actually walked toward Chu Yan. The other’s gaze softened.

 “You must be tired, aren’t you?”

The question startled him. Chu Yan had said something like that long ago, after he’d come back from a grueling assignment. The memory stung — those old struggles seemed almost trivial compared to the exhaustion of their broken bond now.

Xi Che’s heart twisted with mixed emotions. He forced a small smile.

 “What are you talking about…”

But Chu Yan didn’t let him finish. He suddenly cupped the back of his head and pulled him into his arms — just as a sharp “whoosh” cut through the air above them.

 “Careful,” he murmured.

A memory stirred. Back when they’d barely known each other, during a training hunt in the Red Boundary Forest, someone’s stray arrow had almost hit Xi Che. Chu Yan had saved him in just the same way.

Xi Che had remembered that vividly — how, between men, physical contact was something to avoid, even taboo. Accidentally touching another man had always made him recoil.

He’d never doubted his own orientation because of it.

But with Chu Yan… it was different. Chu Yan had never shied from touching him, either.

It shouldn’t have meant anything — but Xi Che couldn’t help overthinking. Could it be that Chu Yan also felt that same inexplicable attraction?

Still, in their unique circumstances, neither of them had ever brought it up. Xi Che assumed it was an unspoken understanding between them. Until the day the truth came out — when he left the Netherworld — and realized how wrong he’d been.

Whatever Chu Yan truly felt, in the end, he had chosen duty.

Countless thoughts flashed through Xi Che’s mind, but his body suddenly fell forward again. They both lost balance and tumbled into the grass. The plants of the Red Boundary were long and soft, their fallen leaves like a woven net — cushioning the fall.

Of course, this was all a dream, so there was no pain anyway.

Xi Che froze, hastily trying to get up — but Chu Yan held him tightly, refusing to let go. It hadn’t happened like this in the real event; this scene was something new, something intimate.

Why was he even dreaming of this follow-up? Could this be some subconscious… desire of his own?

He felt so ashamed he almost wanted to cry.

He didn’t know this entire scene was being shaped by Chu Yan’s will — a projection of the desires he’d long suppressed. He wanted to “complete” the moments he’d missed, the confessions he’d swallowed.

Rationally, he should’ve waited. But he couldn’t anymore. He wanted to use the Dream Stone to give them both closure — or perhaps, a beginning.

Xi Che felt his sash being untied and panicked. He looked up, only to meet Chu Yan’s gaze — full of things that shouldn’t be there.

Before he could react, his head was pushed down; Chu Yan’s lips brushed his ear, his breathing deep and rough.

Xi Che realized the situation was going off track. He pushed against him, shouting,

 “Chu Yan—Chu Yan! I didn’t dream of you for this!”

Chu Yan chuckled softly.

“Then what for?”

Xi Che froze — he didn’t even know how to answer. Chu Yan’s whisper came again, even lower:

“I know. But I’m here for this.”

His voice was gentle, like a feather brushing Xi Che’s heart — stealing his composure. When he finally came to, realization hit him — What kind of indecent thing did Chu Yan just say?!

And that tone — he was teasing him!

This dream obeyed Chu Yan’s will, everything bending toward his desire. The others faded away until only the two of them remained. Xi Che had the strange sense that he had slept with him — more than once. It was as if they were revisiting all their shared memories, but with their connection deepened each time.

Dopamine was a strange thing — even imagined pleasure could make the body believe. Xi Che bit down on Chu Yan’s shoulder, emotions spilling over. His vision blurred as his breath hitched between tears and longing.

Then he heard Chu Yan’s low voice:

 “Asa, what have you been wanting to do lately? I know. You want to tell me.”

Maybe it was true — he did have things he wanted to say. But he shook his head out of habit.

Chu Yan sighed.

“Then… do you only want my body?”

His self-deprecation startled Xi Che.

“What nonsense are you talking about?”

Chu Yan’s eyes lowered as he stroked the back of Xi Che’s neck.

 “It’s the truth. Whatever you want, I’ll give it. You can make me anything you need — even just someone to help you through an incubus’s heat cycle…”

 “Stop! Just stop!”

Xi Che couldn’t stand seeing him so self-effacing. He quickly interrupted and finally confessed the truth:

 “Meng Xinghe asked me to go undercover beside Rong Jiudao. From what he said, they used to be allies, but there’s distrust between them… I have to return to the Divine Academy.”

Chu Yan already knew — but in this dream, Asa’s words came straight from his true spirit. Everything said here was what he truly wanted to tell him.

Relief washed over him. Asa was still willing to open up to him — he just didn’t like the “other” self, the substitute Chu Qi.

Chu Yan kissed his forehead gently.

“Alright. Do what you need to do. I’ll be with you.”

Xi Che didn’t answer, only held him tighter.

Chu Yan looked at him for a long time, and a new unease began to stir in his chest.

Could it be that Asa was only honest with this dream-version of him… and not the real one?