I Will Inspire Your Insipid Days - Volume 1 Chapter 5.2

Epilogue

“…It really went by in the blink of an eye.”

I muttered this while lying in bed, looking up at the ceiling.

Working on illustration projects late into the night had left Natsume-san sleeping soundly next to me, breathing softly. Meanwhile, I was deeply engrossed in a newly acquired technical book.

Every action has its theme or motif, signifying that a “reason” necessary for entertainment exists. For me, who could only acquire information by “seeing,” the foundational theories were completely missing.

Therefore, without fitting logic or techniques into the movements I’ve observed so far, I can’t construct movements that match the images Natsume-san envisions.

What happens without theory?

New value can’t be created.

Now, I’m trying to create a work with Natsume-san.

The words she thinks and the impression I receive from those words are entirely different. Even the term “paintbrush” was loaded with an entirely different ideology than I had imagined.

So, what should I do?

The hint was already given by Komachi-san.

“Yokaze, for now, just increase your moves. Try to watch as many performances as you can, remember them.”

Within the limited time, I visited numerous theaters and art galleries.

I went to bookstores and libraries to cram information on performing arts into my head.

I borrowed a tablet that Natsume-san uses as a submachine, and watched lots of videos.

How do humans perceive beauty and grace in movements?

Where in the dances I know are the movements deemed beautiful located?

I can’t logically formulate hypotheses like Komachi-san, nor do I have the powerful arm to project mental landscapes and knock out others’ sensibilities like Natsume-san.

I only have one weapon.

Just these eyes.

“Natsume-san, wake up. Today’s the main day of the Hohaku Festival.”

“…Aye.”

She tries to cover herself again with the futon, which I prevent. Dragging her out of bed, Natsume-san whines like a child refusing to wake up. I show no mercy.

“Why do I have to wake up too? I’m not going to watch.”

“I know. It’s not about watching the stage; you have a deadline coming up, right?”

“Ahh… that’s right.”

Pushing Natsume-san towards the bathroom and heading to the closet, I have already prepared the costume to wear on stage.

My smartphone pings with an incoming chat message. Looking at the screen, I see a message from Komachi-san.

“Are you awake?”

I reply good morning, and another message quickly follows.

“Let’s do our best today.”

The rehearsal is already completed. Managing the sound and lighting is Komachi-san’s job.

Also, the stage direction has been smoothly coordinated under Komachi-san’s lead. Essentially, all arrangements were meticulously planned by Komachi-san, and I ended up as a mere figurehead, only able to repeat “understood.”

“You’re on at 3:25 PM, but considering the possibility of delays, let’s be ready by 3 PM. So, counting backward, we should finish the final check by 2 PM… Does that work?”

“Understood,” I reply, getting ready to leave the room.

As I’m about to go, I hear from behind,

“Then, let’s give it our all today.”

It wasn’t “Good luck” but “Let’s give it our all” that she said, which made me feel a ticklish sense of participation.

It was a testament to the intention of creating something together.

So, I also responded,

“Yeah. Let’s give it our all.”

The Shumonzaka Girls’ Academy, open to the public only a few times a year, was bustling with people of all ages on the day of the Hohaku Festival. From the main gate to the school building, monuments and statues crafted by students lined the path, with everyone enjoying the view in their own way.

The school walls featured a giant sunroof to prevent direct sunlight from hitting the watercolor and oil paintings displayed. The necessity for last-minute setups due to changing exhibition locations depending on the weather, requiring arrangements of contractors and causing teachers to complain, made me understand the reasons firsthand.

This was my first time witnessing such a scene since coming to this school.

To describe it in a word would be extraordinary, but reflecting on it, it’s only been about three months since I started dressing as a girl and acting as a high school student. Considering that, these densely packed 90 days have also been extraordinary for me.

Alright.

I’m ready to embrace this.

If all this time has been extraordinary, then whatever comes next is no different.

──Opening the heavy steel door that leads to the big hall’s stage.

Suddenly, I recalled the moment my hand touched the exit to the rooftop. Everything began from that instant, leading up to today. If any piece had been missing, I might never have had the chance to stand on such a grand stage.

So, there’s no problem.

Let’s give it our all.

With determination, I move to the backstage area shrouded in darkness.

The costume I’m wearing is a dress inspired by a celestial robe.

The wings for me to take flight.

Carefully stepping forward, mindful of my footing, I head towards the appointed spot.

On stage, the performers before us were showcasing their dance.

The vividly changing colors of the lights every second and the music with deep bass that resonated in the stomach seemed to materialize dynamism, driving the audience into a frenzy.

Peering from the wings, I could see many eyes. Countless gazes that I would soon face. Me, who can’t create anything, gathering these gazes with the wings I’ve been granted.

Every time my body tensed with fear, I remembered Natsume-san’s voice.

It’s okay. It’s okay.

Finally, the previous performance concluded, and a big round of applause filled the hall. The performers exited. The stage darkened, and a staff member nudged my back. I slowly resumed walking.

An illusion of a whiteout in my vision.

Simultaneously, a warm sensation tingled behind my eyes.

…So stage lights are this bright.

Feeling somewhat detached from reality, I head to the rehearsed position.

The loss of vision makes the scenes burned into my brain stand out more vividly.

Natsume-san continued to draw rough sketches even after that day, creating more detailed animations to convey the “movement” to me.

My blueprint for conveying movement.

But at the same time, she also created images as if a bird was about to take flight.

Those were originally unnecessary.

So why did Natsume-san create such things?

Voices of astonishment and confusion echo from all corners of the hall.

“Could this be…”

“‘Natsume’s illustrations… right?”

“It’s definitely that… No one else could draw this…”

“But how…?”

“Why would they go to the trouble for a high school festival…?”

I engrave it firmly in my memory.

Tracing the path laid out by Natsume-san and Komachi-san, I stand here.

My first experience.

Creating something together with someone.

The colors reflected from the screen behind me shift. From a deep blue embodying silence, to a bewitching purple, gradually intensifying into a fiery crimson.

I let the flowing music guide my movements.

“Yokaze, become my paintbrush.”

Every fingertip, toe, and strand of hair.

The multiple “movements” intricately drawn by Natsume-san.

My thoughts slow, yet my body moves swiftly.

Without losing the image of movement, I shift my position as indicated by Natsume-san, replicating the elegant actions stored in my memory.

From “stillness” to “motion.”

I dance across the stage, floating, like a piece just released from its string, surrendering to the laws of physics. What is the source of this intense pulsation that seems to surge from deep within my chest?

The light on the screen changes.

Eventually, silence dominates the stage.

My body comes to a sharp halt.

I bow deeply, expressing gratitude to the audience.

Thank you.

For watching over me.

My eyes never forget what they’ve seen once.

Just like that, I hope my figure remains etched in the eyes of everyone filling the hall for a long time.

Amidst thunderous applause enveloping my field of vision, I leave the stage.

Bonus Chapter

???

“…Maybe that kid gained a bit of confidence too. The look in his eyes as he headed to the stage, he seemed like a completely different person. Man, I was almost in tears.”

“Hmm.”

The voice coming from the smartphone speaker is clearly uplifted. But, considering the person is naturally high-spirited, this is pretty much his usual manner of speaking.

However, it’s surprising to hear him talk so cheerfully about that kid.

But then again, Satsuki has always been vocal about that kid’s situation at the Hanabishi family meetings, even at the cost of being ostracized, so it’s not really unnatural.

“So, Yokaze’s doing well, huh?”

“At first, someone who ran away from home was completely dissatisfied with her selfish behavior.”

“Heh, there are selfish people out there, huh?”

“Who do you think you’re talking about…”

“Obviously me.”

“It’s no laughing matter! But… well, yeah. You seem well too, which is good.”

“Eh? Was there ever a moment I wasn’t lively?”

“In this line of work, I see a lot of young people who hide their weaknesses and end up crushed. I wouldn’t be surprised if you’ve been crying behind our backs.”

“Huh?”

I hear a grating sound near my ear and instinctively look over, only to realize it was the sound of me gripping my smartphone too tightly.

“What? Got mad because I hit the nail on the head~?”

“I really like that about you, Satsuki.”

“Yokaze, you’ve recently become more like you. Truly siblings, huh. Being lifted up by the geniuses around and experiencing the stage, next you should take another step forward and find the stage you want to──”

“That doesn’t really have much to do with me.”

“…What do you mean? What are you thinking?”

I cut off her words, and a baffled voice came through.

“It means just that. It’s unrelated. That’s mine.”

“Hey! Wait──”

I cut off the call without waiting for a reply. There’s no need to continue.

I stretch my back as if to shake off the gloomy emotions.

So, it’s come to that, huh?

Self-awareness has been born.

“Then, I guess I’ll take those newly sprouted emotions──big sis will take them.”

That’s fine, right? Cute little brother?

[End]