Ranobe Mo Ore Mo Sukina Gyaru - Volume 1 Chapter 12.2

Gal and Sleepless Night 2

After a somewhat comfortable silence had lingered for a while… Tsumakawa suddenly muttered something with a voice that lacked energy.

It sounded like she was talking to herself, and it was somewhat inaudible.

“…Could I complain just a little bit?”

“…Sure, go ahead.”

“…Thanks…”

I realized that my right sleeve was being tightly held once again.

However, I didn’t pay much attention to Tsumakawa and instead gazed at the faint moonlight streaming in through the window. She began to speak passionately.

It was a story about the conflict with her father that led her to stay over at my place today.

“…Deep down, I know that what Dad says is right.”

” ….. “

“It’s my fault… because I didn’t obey the curfew, I made Dad say those things… Dad was wrong, but I’m the one who pushed him to say the wrong things, so I shouldn’t have run away from home or talked back to Dad. I knew that… But I had to get angry at that moment because I would have been disappointed in myself. It’s not like I was wrong too… I wonder if this is just me being selfish?”

” ….. “

“To be honest, I really hate my Dad. I can’t stand going home and seeing his face, and sometimes I even wish he would just die — but if he really did, I think I’d cry a lot… uh, I don’t want my Dad to die with our relationship being like this. Well, the feeling of wanting him dead isn’t a lie, but only a little bit… still, I truly don’t want him to die… Ahahaha, I’m just talking without any understanding, aren’t I? My thoughts are so jumbled and unorganized.”

” ….. “

“That’s why I think I want to get along with Dad… I want to stop genuinely hating him. When Dad is saying the right things, I want to acknowledge him. When he says something wrong, instead of getting angry and attacking, I want to calmly correct him… Besides, I became friends with Mom, whom I love so much, so surely, I can become friends with the Dad whom my mom chose too. I should be able to like him. I think so, but…that’s only because I’ve become calm right now. When I actually stand in front of Dad, my emotions will likely change again…”

” ….. “

“If I could just accept things as they are, it might be easier. Perhaps it’d be best for me if I could just give up on my Dad… But somewhere deep down, I know that’s not the best for me. Because when the time comes for me to get married, I want to walk down the aisle with my Dad by my side. Even if it’s impossible now, when that time comes, I want him to acknowledge me. I want him to wholeheartedly accept the person I choose to marry— So not being able to give up on my Dad is, how should I put it… maybe a bit tough for me…”

Tsumakawa finished speaking and let out a big sigh.

On the other hand, I could only glance at her profile, lost in my thoughts.

『Hey. Yoda, you’re really a big idiot, aren’t you?』

She was the one to whom I had revealed my embarrassing feelings.

Tsumakawa hugged me and said that…

Even though I wanted to repay her feelings, I couldn’t find the right words to ease her troubles.

No matter how much I turned over the drawers in my mind, I couldn’t find anything.

So, the words that came out of my unreliable mouth were just these,

“Tsumakawa-san, it must be hard for you too…”

“Heh… Don’t think you’re the only one going through hard times, you dummy.”

Ah, that’s not it… That’s not what I meant to say.

I didn’t want to say something like this. Sorry, that’s not it…

I thought that while looking at Tsumakawa, who was pretending to be cheerful while grinning and patting my shoulder.

I’m frustrated. She relied on me, but I couldn’t give her back what she asked for, and that really frustrated me.

Surely, if I were the protagonist of a light novel, things wouldn’t have turned out like this.

If I had even one quality like those characters, perhaps I could’ve provided Tsumakawa with some profound words or taken an action that would’ve comforted her heart…

Unfortunately, I’m just a gloomy high school student who loves light novels.

I realized that I couldn’t do anything for her and that I’m not skilled enough to do something, especially when someone needs help like she does.

Having thought this far, I inadvertently blurted out some words… Even though I knew that saying this to Tsumakawa-san was off the mark. Nevertheless, I ended up conveying my feelings to her.

“…I’m sorry, Tsumakawa-san. I can’t seem to come up with anything clever to say…”

“Huh, why is Yoda apologizing? You’re the one who had to listen to my complaints. If anything, I should be apologizing. You permitted me to vent, so I won’t apologize! “

“Tsumakawa-san…”

“By the way, Yoda, do you not get what I meant by telling you this? It’s not like I’m asking for a clear answer. It’s not about wanting someone to provide a solution; it’s more about wanting someone to listen to me.”

“Is that so…?”

“Yeah, that’s right. That’s why — just talking to Yoda like this, there’s a part of me that feels a bit saved. Because you listen to my complaints, which surely aren’t pleasant to hear, with such sincerity, my heart feels just a bit lighter, you know?

“But I haven’t done anything…”

“…Yeah, I’m glad I turned to you, Yoda. I’m glad that Yoda was with me on this hard night…”

” ….. “

With those beautiful words, she gathered her spirits and presented me with a smile that seemed forcibly wrung out from within her.

At this moment, there was a distinct sound in my eardrums, as if something had changed.

My light novel friend, Minacho——The class’s cheerful girl, Miona Tsumakawa.

For some reason, she had taken an interest in me, a gloomy, nerdy otaku.

Even though I had protested with ‘I can’t understand three-dimensional girls, they’re scary’ and tried to distance her, Tsumakawa had ignored that and made efforts to be with me.

And now, she was… in my house, not at Horito’s or Kanachamu’s, not at the house of a male friend or a female friend.

It’s none other than the Yoda’s family home——